How To Support Someone In A Mental Health Crisis: 13 Tips

Supporting a friend, relative, peer, or colleague through a mental health crisis can feel like navigating uncharted waters with no compass. It’s complex, it’s daunting, and it often requires more than just good intentions. Yet, it’s during these times that your support can mean the world to that person. Drawing from deeply insightful accounts shared by people in our Earkick community who have been on the receiving end of such support, let’s explore how you can be the lighthouse in the storm for your loved ones.

1. In A Mental Health Crisis: Listen More Than You Speak

Imagine you’re carrying a backpack filled with rocks, each rock representing a worry or a problem. Now, imagine someone simply allowing you to unload these rocks, listening as you describe each one. That’s the power of listening.

When someone is going through a mental health crisis, they might not need advice; they might just need someone to sit with them, listen, and acknowledge their struggles without judgment. It’s about giving them space to express themselves freely.

For instance, if your friend shares their feelings, resist the urge to immediately offer solutions. Instead, say something like,

“I’m here for you, and I’m listening. Take all the time you need to share what’s on your mind.”

Don’t expect something in return or the person you are supporting to express their gratitude for what you do. They may simply not be able to do so now, but they will once they come out of their depression. Watch the video below to learn why.

2. In A Mental Health Crisis: Ask, Don’t Assume

Your idea of help might not align with what the person actually needs. Instead of assuming, ask specific questions like, “Would you like to go for a walk or watch a movie together?” or “Do you need help with chores?” Tailor your support by asking how you can be most helpful, and be ready to act on their requests, whether it’s picking up groceries or simply sending a good morning text.

Imagine your sibling is struggling with anxiety. Instead of assuming they want to be alone, ask,

“Would you like company, or do you prefer some quiet time? I’m here either way.”

3. Educate Yourself On Mental Health

If someone you care about is dealing with a specific mental health condition, take the time to learn about it. Understanding the nuances of their experience can help you avoid harmful stereotypes and offer more empathetic support. This doesn’t mean you need to become an expert overnight, but even a basic understanding can go a long way.

Suppose your partner has been diagnosed with depression. You might spend some time reading up on depression, then say,

“I read that sometimes, people with depression find it hard to communicate how they’re feeling. I want you to know I’m trying to understand better and am here for you.”

Cartoons often address mental health, like in Winnie the Pooh. Characters, such as Eeyore, may represent mental health struggles, sparking discussions about Winnie the Pooh mental illness and emotional challenges.

4. Thoughtful Gestures Matter During A Mental Health Crisis

Sometimes, it’s the small things that carry us through the darkest times. A simple, thoughtful gift or a heartfelt letter can be a tangible reminder to your loved one that they are not alone. Whether it’s a book, a playlist, or even a homemade meal, these gestures show that you care and are thinking of them.

When a co-worker is going through a tough time, sending a card with a message like,

“Thinking of you. No need to respond, but know I’m here,”

can show your support without putting pressure on them.

5. During A Mental Health Crisis: Embrace Teamwork

No one can carry the burden of support alone, and attempting to do so can lead to burnout. It’s okay to reach out to mutual friends, family members, or even professionals to share the load. This network of support ensures that your loved one always has someone to turn to, and it also allows you to take care of your own mental health.

If a friend is struggling, you might group message other close friends:

“Let’s make sure we’re checking in on Alex regularly. I’ve noticed they’re having a hard time and could use our support.”

6. Avoid Unsolicited Advice During A Mental Health Crisis

While it might be tempting to offer solutions or share what worked for you, remember that unsolicited advice can sometimes feel dismissive. Support your loved one’s autonomy by respecting their choices and encouraging them to make decisions that feel right for them, even if you don’t always agree.

When your cousin vents about their stress, resist saying, “You should just relax.” Instead, offer a listening ear and ask how you can support them, acknowledging their feelings are valid. Feeling heard is very important for us humans.

7. Navigate the System Together

The mental health care system can be overwhelming. Offering to help find a therapist, accompany them to appointments, or even just understand their treatment options can make a significant difference. It’s about lightening the load and showing that they don’t have to navigate the system alone.

For a friend overwhelmed by finding a therapist, you could offer,

“Would it help if I looked up some therapists in our area and sent you the links? I can also help you prepare questions for your first visit.”

If your friend can’t bring herself to go see a therapist, be patient. You may also offer to check out a free online AI chat (no sign up) for mental health together. It can help your friend work through her thoughts and emotions over and over again without feeling judged or fearing she’s a burden to you or others.

8. Keep Trust Intact

It’s crucial to maintain trust, especially when you might not agree with all of your loved one’s choices. Encourage open communication by creating a judgment-free zone where they can share their thoughts and feelings without fear of reprimand or disappointment.

If a loved one makes a choice you don’t agree with, rather than expressing disappointment, you might say,

“I’m here to support you. Let’s talk about what led to this decision and how I can help going forward.”

9. Continuous Check-ins Work

Recovery is not linear, and appearances can be deceiving. Continue to check in on your loved one, even when they seem to be doing better. A simple “How are you really feeling today?” can provide an opening for them to share their true state of mind.

After your friend starts therapy, instead of assuming they’re fine, check in by saying,

“I’m proud of you for seeking help. How are you feeling about everything? Remember, I’m here whenever you need to talk.”

10. The Person, Not the Illness

Your loved one is not defined by their mental health condition. It’s essential to remind them—and yourself—of their value and worth, separate from their struggles. Showing unwavering support and acceptance is paramount.

Remind your loved one of their strengths and qualities beyond their mental health struggle.

“You’re such a compassionate person, and your ability to listen and understand others is amazing. Remember, you’re not alone in this.”

11. Proactive Support During A Mental Health Crisis

Don’t wait for them to reach out for help. Take the initiative to check in, offer support, and be present. Your proactive approach can break through the isolation and stigma often associated with mental health issues.

Supporting someone through a mental health crisis is an act of love and courage. It’s about being present, being patient, and showing empathy. Remember, you don’t have to be perfect; you just have to be there. And sometimes, that’s enough to make all the difference in the world.

Notice a friend posting vague, worrying statuses online? Instead of scrolling past, send a private message:

“I saw your post and just wanted to check in. How are you really doing? I’m here to listen.”

12. Encourage Professional Help When Necessary

Recognizing when a loved one needs professional help is crucial. While offering your support, it’s also important to encourage seeking help from mental health professionals when necessary. This could mean therapy, counseling, or even medication under a doctor’s supervision.

You can offer to help research therapists, make phone calls, or provide transportation to appointments. Remember, suggesting professional help isn’t about dismissing your ability to support them; it’s about ensuring they get the comprehensive care they need. For example, if you notice that your friend has been unable to get out of bed for days, gently suggest,

“Have you thought about talking to someone who could help you navigate these feelings? I can help you look for someone if you like.”

13. Celebrate Small Victories

Mental health recovery is full of ups and downs, and it’s vital to acknowledge and celebrate the small victories along the way. Whether it’s managing to get out of bed, attending a therapy session, or simply having a good day, these moments are worth recognizing. Celebrating these achievements can boost morale and encourage positive momentum. You might say,

“I noticed you made it to your appointment today despite feeling down, and I’m really proud of you for that.”

This affirmation reinforces their progress and reminds them that their efforts are seen and valued.

Now stop scrolling, go support a loved one!